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Gray Feather Ch1

Birth of Gray Feather

The first thing I noticed as I came too was every thing felt wrong.  Not in me but around me..  I slowly opened my eyes, every thing looked tinged…  And there where bubbles..?  I was in water, I must be drowning, I thought.  I started to struggle but found my self restrained.  I thrashed about, never once realizing that I was breathing some how.  I caught a glimpse of my hand as I struggled… Only it wasn’t a hand, it was a claw..  Claws, I had claws.  For a moment I stopped my struggles and gazed at my claws…  Yes, I had claws once more.  Then it all came back to me.

My name is, was, Kevin Gray.  I worked for Nargus Laboratory Inc.  I was far from the most accomplished or brightest of the scientists working there.  I admit I was much closer to the bottom of the lot.  What made me stand out was that I did not think the same as the rest of them.  Scientists, especially the really smart ones, like those who surrounded me every day, did not think the same as every one else.  Neither did I, nor did I think quite like them.  The way my mind worked was some where in the middle of the two.  Because of this I brought a fresh prospective to things, looking at things from a different angle.

One of the very first things I was set to work on was an issue with the raptor transformations.  The transformations were not the problem.  It was how people reacted to the transformation. Nearly all of the ‘unwilling’ subjects became rebellious after.  That’s right, there where unwilling test subjects, and while one might thing that was why they became rebellious there was a also a good percentage of willing ones who had the same issues to some extent after. Transforming them back only made things worse.  While they may not have wanted the change to start with, they wanted less to change back.

I will not bore you with the details but I will say I came up with some additions to the program that helped and helped get things going in the right direction to where almost none of the willing subjects became rebellious and fewer of the unwilling ones did as well.  Fewer, but still much more than half did.  As for what the ‘program’ was..  It started out as something transferred to the subjects mind during transformation.  It was just something to help the subjects adapt to their new bodies.  The first ones, the pioneers of it, had to learn how to use their new bodies from scratch, learning to walk and talk all over again.  The information gathered from these ones helped build the base program for the later subjects.  Sadly there where side effects to those early transformations.  The minds of some didn’t hold up and had to be wiped completely, leaving them as fully feral raptors.

I admit that I became a bit obsessed with my work.  What was causing those raptors to be so rebellious.  The addiction some seemed to get to it also captured my curiosity, but that was not part of my study.  This obsession is what lead to my down fall.  No.  Not my down fall but my rebirth, to a new beginning.  I did all I could with the data that had been gathered, none of the new subjects where offering up anything new.  I decided the only way to get better information was from first hand experience.  I knew my supervisors would never go for what I had planned so I did it in secret knowing that what I was about to do would be discovered in the end.  There was no way to help that, but I had hoped that it would be over looked with what I learned.

My plan was simple.  To transform my self.  Not only to do the transformation but to do so with no programming.  I would be helpless at first but I had things set up so I would be dumped in an isolated room with food.  To get to the food I would have to learn how to walk again, how to move on my own with no help at all…  I must say, when I woke that fist time, even laying helpless on the ground, flopping about a bit as I learned to get control of my new body, that the experience is not something one could ever put into words.  I understood then why it was so addicting.  I could hardly get to my feet and was falling over every few steps and I already never wanted to return.

I did learn a lot from my experience.  Much of which I can’t put into words, others I wont.  I got to mingle with the other raptors for a shot while before I was finally discovered.  They didn’t trust me.  Not the group I was with.   They where the ones who wanted t rebel.  Even as a raptor they where still suspicious of me.  I still might be the enemy.  A sheep in wolfs clothing.  One did open up to me though, told me things that I would never have suspected.  I will not betray her trust now by saying who she was or what was told to me.  She also showed me the ways of raptor mating.   I can not say which time I lost my virginity was more incredible.  I can say that I mated her more that first evening than I did the girl I lost my virginity to the first time.  I hope some day I will get to see her again.

I was transformed back to my human self once caught.  I didn’t want to go, and resisted at first, then realized that I could do more good if I went back, even if for a short while.  I was both wrong and right bout that.  I could do more by going back but no longer at Nargus Laboratory.  Now my coworkers where suspicious of me.  I tried to act normal but even I could tell something had changed.  I could no longer be the person I was.  I knew at best they where thinking of letting me go but I was too dangerous, knew too much to just let to.  Knew too much to change back to a raptor and put me with the rest of them.  I think the only reason I lasted long enough to get away was because they where trying to decided if I could still be useful to them.  So before I got terminated in one way or another I decided to leave my self.

I didn’t just leave though.  I gathered things up to take with me.  Things that where not going to easily be missed.  Things in storage, computer components, some biochemicals, ya they had so much that a hundred gallons wouldn’t be missed till year end inventory.   I even managed to get my hands on a stasis tube that was in storage waiting repair.  What was I going to do with all this stuff..  I had heard stories of the first lab, long abandoned now and likely over grown.  It sounded like a place that would suit my new desires well.  I could hardly stand to be inside buildings any more.  I don’t know how I managed to keep my sanity on the days leading up to my departure.

I stole a truck and some one’s ID to get out and haul all the things I had gathered.  I knew I didn’t have much time till some one noticed.  The hardest part would be getting on the boat going to the main land.  I planed things out to leave on a night one of them was hading out.  Not many do leave at night but some do, the ones always in a hurry.  That suited me just fine as it would be that much sooner I would be on the main land.  I had some fake papers made up, which wasn’t easy.  Bu that time they where watching me closer than ever.  Most nights I had to sneak out of my room or try to use the air ducts to avoid notice and use of my key card.  That would only allow them to track my movements.

The most heart stopping moment was at the boat though.  All my papers, I thought, looked legit enough.  As did my ID.  But they had me stopped there for a long while.  I guess they weren’t buying my story of a late shipment that didn’t make the manifest.  I stat there nervously as calls where made and people talked to.  I had the AC cranked up and I was still sweating.  My heart was racing when the phone was finally putt down and they headed back to my truck.  Surely just from my own reactions they must suspect something.

I will never know why fate smiled on me that night, or what gods blessed me but they let me on.  I didn’t get out of the truck for some hours, not until I was sure my heart wasn’t about to tear through my chest.  I should have stayed in the truck as I noticed the crews suspicious glances at me and heard their whispers. For the rest of the right I did my best to avoid every one and spent much of it just watching the water go by.  As land neared I started to get paranoid that something would happen on the main land.

But it didn’t.  The captain gave me a last long quizzical look that made me squirm before he sent me on my way.  I wondered how long I had left until something was noticed, if it hadn’t been already.  The sun was just coming up as I drove off.  I had to laugh at that because I was heading east, driving off into the sun rise.  Then I realized how fitting that was.  Stories end with people driving or riding off into the sunset.  My story was just starting though.  I quickly took to the back roads to avoid any searches that might soon or already where started.  Some body would be in big trouble for this though I didn’t know who.  I felt a little sorry for the person on the other end of that phone who gave me clearance.

My rout took longer but I felt it was far safer.  When I arrived at the old lab it was a mess.  It still is, come to think of it.  Yet it felt like home the moment I laid eyes on it.  I quickly went to work fixing up what I needed to to get things running enough to work with.  I also went about making my most important item, my control helm.  I did not plan on staying much longer as the human Kevin Gray but raptor claws do not work equipment well.  I would have to find more help later on but I was too eager to get things started and the helm would allow me to control things with my thoughts in a way.

Once every thing was set up I was read to become a raptor once more.  I knew I might have to change back at times, in fact it was a certainty.  I didn’t care.  I missed my raptor body too much.  Even if I did change back I would never, in mind, be human again.  I settled into the tank and waited for it to start.  There is pain, then blackness.  This leads me full circle once more.  Now all I have to do is think the command to open the stasis tube and…  Ah, freedom!  A freedom greater than any human will ever know, for I am no longer human….

I Am Raptor!

I Am Gray Feather!!!

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